Have you ever had someone talk about you? You know say things that are not true, to other people. I have, many times, still happens. People always ask me, why don’t you do anything about it? Why don’t you fight back?
I always say, coming up in ranks (belts), I learned a very important lesson. “What someone is saying about you behind your back, is truly what they believe of themselves”.
Sound confusing? Let me explain. People will always talk bad about someone, for multiple reasons. Whatever they say, is usually what they are doing themselves.
Someone calls you a liar... reality, they are the liar themselves.
Someone calls you a thief... reality, they are the thief themselves.
Speaking negatively about someone, you will speak what you know, what you live. You will be an expert on the subject, (your chosen words of describing another human being) because you do those things yourself.
My other reason for not reacting to someone talking about me behind my back, with lies.
It’s not true. Why would I fight against something that is not true? Why would I put so much energy into someone’s lies? Why should I care about what someone, who doesn’t mean anything to me, says?
Grant it, it’s not easy, standing your silent ground. I will guarantee, it’s worth it! You see the truth will always find it’s way into everything, lies, stories, embellishments. Having trust in the truth, is one of the hardest things anyone can do.
People you have known for a lifetime, will believe those lies. When the truth surfaces, they will act like, oh well, I didn’t know.
Accept people for who they are & forgive. Forgiveness is a tool to let you win. Once you forgive them, they have no part of you anymore.
Again I am not saying this is easy, also forgiving someone doesn’t mean you have to be their friend or even talk to them. Forgive them so you can concentrate on you, building your life better.
Martial Arts has given me this ability & strength, to be able to use these tools against my verbal enemies, and succeed.
Stop by our karate club & learn how to use Martial Arts against the verbal bully.
Social exclusion is a form of bullying that a lot of times gets pushed aside. When you are the only person who doesn't get to play, that is rough for children and adults. Where no one will talk to you, it's like they don't even see you. You feel like you don't exist. You are told, you will meet some nice friends soon, they must have not seen you, they probably forgot about you today, tomorrow will better, you'll see. You hold onto those words like they are gold, you want those words someone is telling you to be true. As time goes on, you realize, none of these people like me, so I'm not going to like myself. Every day gets harder, this is where people actually put themselves down before anyone else does. It's just the beginning of hating yourself. Unfortunately as humans we are so harmful to ourselves, we need to stop doing that. Right now, if you are in a position where you are shy, by yourself all the time, people not noticing you, you feel yourself hiding from people. Also you are putting yourself down, giving excuses as to why people don't include you. STOP! Right now I need you to STOP!
Grab your cell phone, a piece of paper & pencil, heck even a crayon would work. Write these words for me. I am a good person, I like myself, my favorite thing is ____________________, I am good at____________________, and I know one person who also likes me.
I am your one person, Master Petrillo likes you. I do not have to know you to like you, I just like you. Everyday you will write these words down on something, your phone, a diary, a piece of paper. Just write these words, it doesn't matter who you are or where you are from.
Do this everyday... everyday!
Your life will change some everyday, you be the change instead of waiting for someone else to change and include you. You will change and soon you will like yourself, you will attract other people who like you. Doesn't matter if it is a child or an adult, it works.
This is why I love Martial Arts, when you are on the training floor, there is no exclusion. Everyone is training the same way, the same things. Your rank (belt) is where you would be doing different techniques, higher ranks have harder techniques than lower ranks. All that does is makes the lower ranks want to work harder to get to the higher ranks level. Starting is the first step, everyone walks on the training floor as a white belt, we all had to start there. We all know what it's like. The only reason I am a higher rank than you is because I walked onto the training floor as a white belt before you did, and I stayed, I didn't quit.
Consider Martial Arts for your children and for yourself.
Become a white belt that didn't quit & be a leader!
Bullying has become a major problem in our school districts, more children are being bullied in our schools then ever before. Why don't the school districts do anything about bullying? Because it doesn't exist, to them. Kids just being kids, right? Wrong! Children are killing themselves on the words of other children. When you say those words, it sounds silly, even though it is so real in todays world. Schools want to grow with the world, change to make everyone accept everyone, (except for the children being bullied) they will accept who you want to be, what you want to be.
Tell a teacher or an adult in charge that someone called you stupid, dumb, idiot... for 6 months, everyday, you tend to believe it, even though the teacher or adult in charge does not. How many times did this poor child tell the teachers or adult in charge that this is happening to them? Guarantee it wasn't everyday for the last 6 months. If the child did, that teacher or adult in charge would be so sick of that kid being a tattletale.
How can this be happening at a place where your child needs to go everyday? Easy... It just takes enough people to look the other way when it's happening.
What would you do if you were the adult in charge? Look the other way or step up and do something about it?
Now before you answer these questions, you have to research and find out why the adults are looking the other way or pretending it's not happening. Are they being told that, this is the way to handle a bullying situation? Or are the adults just trying to get through the day
Let me know what you would do?